I worked a shift at the shelter yesterday. We had a memorial circle for a beloved resident of our floor who passed away from alcohol related causes. The gathering was, for the most part, tasteful, respectful, and the guys expressed themselves sincerely...right up until the end when one of the so-called 'friends' of the deceased arrived as the service was concluding. I had a head's up at the beginning as to his whereabouts and I already knew one of the guys was pretty bent out of shape about the fact that this guy went out drinking instead of attending the service. This said, most of the men around the circle were well on their way themselves by 10:30am when we started the sharing. One guy passed out and began snoring while another guy shared from his heart. A dispute broke out between several of the men as to whether the deceased had been drinking rubbing alcohol on the day he died or not. But generally I was able to keep them on topic and speaking one at a time. We ended with some very heartfelt sentiments and there was appreciation all around for the opportunity to get together in the midst of a place fraught with ridiculous behaviour. Just before I could pronounce a final benediction the frowned upon friend walked in proclaiming his apologies for being 'late'. This elicited the ire of one guy in particular who quickly confronted the latecomer and an altercation broke out. Voices were raised, strong words were exchanged about disrespecting the dead, some pushing and shoving ensued, and any indication that we had just had a meaningful remembrance went out the window. The supervisor, having heard the ruckus, came rushing to the scene looking confused as to how a fight could break out during a time of somber reflection.
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